Well, it has been a while since I've posted. Guess I took a little blog vacation, and I kinda wonder how many people really read this thing anyway, so I've been debating on just going to a private journal that I can write in with pen and paper. We'll see about that.

In the meantime, tons of things have happened since I last blogged, including my brother's joining together with Andrea in marriage, me being put in charge of the theater for a week, a mini vacation to Lake Cumberland with TJ and his family, and the death of my grandpa. It's hard to believe all of these things have come and gone so fast, and sometimes I begin to feel like I am in a dream, like these things aren't really happening because of my diminished feelings and emotions. Sometimes I don't feel like I feel anymore. Things just come and go, and I don't really feel them. It's kind of hard to explain, but I think it has a lot to do with my life being so preoccupied with things it shouldn't be preoccupied with. My life revolves around me and my self-worth, self-esteem, and body image, and it seems that as long as I am a slave to these things, I don't really experience life to it's fullest....like a dream, just kind of floating through things with no feelings.

Other than these thoughts, I've been watching relationships in our family the past couple days, and it's been pretty cool, just to see how relationships change over time and how one person can relate one way to a certain person and relate in a totally different way to another person. And, if there is one good thing that seems to come from death, it is a closer bonding in relationships. I must say, it has been a really good feeling to have everyone together again.